My (Twenty) First Time

Tomorrow will bring a day that I have waited rather non-patiently for since I was 15. I have fantasized, romanticized and devised my plans for when I turn 21. Tomorrow I will no longer be underage, and you know what I’m gonna do?? Not a damn thing. That’s not actually true. Tomorrow I am planning on studying during the day, working until eight, and meeting for a group project at nine. It’s an interesting feeling knowing that my 15-year-old self would call me a loser today.

I've literally been picturing exactly what my 21^st birthday would be like every time I’ve closed my eyes for the last six years. I say this because every time I have closed my eyes, I have seen nothing but black. And I always figured I would black out pretty hard when I became legal.

A few things have changed about me over the years, but one thing has remained the same. Now more than ever, I love irony. This is why I can’t get over the fact that currently I really don’t care for getting drunk. Again, if my 15-year-old self realized that being drunk would lose its appeal before I turn 21, he’d question a lot more than my attitudes toward drinking. 

I still like beer. I actually really like beer, and I can’t wait to taste quality beer at a quality bar. That being said, I do regret that my first legal drink won’t be at Bar Knox. I know it wasn’t a quality place and didn’t have quality beer, but I always had interesting times there. The last time I went was especially epic. It was last summer, and the party was boppin… until some guys got into a rocky argument that was topped off when an off-duty cop got punched. Yeah. Good times.

One recent development that I feel has had an impact on me is getting a twitter. It’s nice knowing that there’s a social media site that forces me to limit my narcissism to 140 characters or less. It can even be educational. By following various media outlets, I am more informed about current events than I was before I got a twitter. So it’s definitely worth getting just to hear about important things, like what celebrities have for lunch on any given day.

Since I started this blog, I’ve gotten a modest but encouraging number of page views. Lately, I’ve gotten a lot of hits from Egypt, Turkey and Iran. I’m not sure why I have so many views from those places. As far as I know, I don’t blog anywhere about nuclear secrets. Those visitors must have landed on my page accidentally while they were searching for The Weekend Amateur Nuclear Secrets Enthusiast. I do wish those visitors would stop viewing my page though. Between their visits and me briefly following Al Jazeera on twitter, I can’t help but feel that I made a government list somewhere.

To wrap things up, I want to say thank you to everyone who has wished me a happy birthday. I am always touched by the number of birthday texts I receive. I want to specifically give a shout out to Brett Farve and his overwhelming enthusiasm for my birthday this year. Although Brett, I do think you went a bit overboard with your texts again.

I must go now. It’s my twenty-first, and I got some not getting drunk to do. 

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

So we're Confident this Post should Up our Word Count

As many of you know, The Weekend Aristocrat has been rather lazy this semester. Many factors are to blame for this. For starters, the main aristocrat here has got a real job, and blogging just doesn't support the aristocrat lifestyle like it used to. Nevertheless, we feel it is time to share something again with our countless number of fans. We say countless because everytime we actually count our number of fans, the number is always less than our egos would like to admit.

Without further ado, here is where most of our time has gone this semester...

You will never find a hamburger cooked this rare. Not to mention, this is an extremely rare type of hamburger meat.

Johnny Appleseed: yet another example of a childhood star who grew up to be nothing more than tragic, barefoot pothead.

There is no punchline to this pic. This is just to demonsrate how much effort for writing we have given up to play tetris. This also shows how much better we are at tetris than you.

Our mental image of a sour patch kid. You are what you eat.

This is a cosine. Don't worry if you don't get this one: that probably means you have a life.

I've always wanted to have Venetian blinds in my future house. Unfortuneately, they wouldn't be able to see my other decorations.

What else can we say other than that this pic is so money?

This is a picture of Ray Charles Bans. All credit on this one goes to a fellow Aristocrat locally known as my roommate.

This is a picture of a modern Big Mac meal. Apparently meals with Big Macs now come with apples. iMlovin'it.